Breakdown of Reporters at Channel 2

First let me start out with one of the funniest things I have ever seen in my entire life and makes me giggle every time I think about it. And this is not from a comedy skit or fake news show like Jon Stewart. This is an actual member of the News 2 Houston staff, a station that attemps to be serious.
Without further ado. Ladies and gentleman...

RADAR, THE CHANNEL 2 WEATHER DOG.
I could write an entire segment on how hilarious this dog is.
They have a dog… giving the weather. Frank comes out, he points at the green screen for a while, and then they consult… a dog. F-ing brilliant.
A hurricane comes curving its way towards us in the Gulf Coast. What does Radar, the Channel 2 Weather Dog, think? Ruff. (Which translates to “rain.”) Thank you, Radar. You’ve been more than enough help in outdoing Frank, but more so in establishing the professionalism at KPRC. Sit. Stay. Good Channel 2 Weather Dog.

Dominique Sachse
What Jessica Rabbit would look like if she ditched the ears and donned a red blazer instead.

Bill Balleza
What ethnicity are you, Bill? Really. I’d like to know.

Linda Lorelle
Linda is known for her stories on breast cancer, touching the lives of ten, maybe twenty people. She won Emmy’s for her stories about it. Thank you for bringing breast cancer to our attention. Bravo. Bravo, Linda. Here’s one of those naked statues.

Kym Alvarado
So unimportant, they didn’t include a picture of her on the website. But they had a picture of Radar, the Channel 2 weather dog. Nice work. Way to earn some respect over there.

Just to recap, Kym Alvarado… no picture. Radar, the channel 2 weather dog... picture... beloved pet.

Khambrel Marshall
He’s cool. We’re tight. Shout out to my boy, Khambrel.

Chris Wragge
Pretty boy. Younger than I am. Makes videos of him shooting hoops and calls it news. Likes men.

Frank Billingsley
Nothing worse than being a weather man. Don’t fool yourself with fancy titles like meteorologist, because that’s like giving a nice-sounding technician label to the water boy. Is it going to rain? We don’t know. And neither do you. Doppler 2000 can’t save you. And neither can Radar… the Channel 2 Weather Dog.
(Addition: When I was checking the links to make sure it worked, I glanced at your picture again. And you’re a douche.)

So there it is, in all its glory. Channel 2's sensationalist squad. Go get 'em, Radar.